What are you grateful for today?

This question is simple and yet, somehow elusive. How easy is it to slip into the "I'm not getting what I want or need out of life" attitude. Answering this question on a daily basis can have an everlasting positive effect on life's day to day circumstances.

Here's a great way to keep the dulldrums away by maintaining an attitude of gratitude.

Try this exercise for 7 days and see how it positively impacts your life:

Write down 5 things you are grateful for in your life today. Do the same tomorrow as well. It's okay if one or two things appear on the list each day. But also add new things. If you get in the flow and want to put more than 5 things down, go for it. No need to edit yourself!

I work on this with my Visceral Coaching clients all the time. It's an empowering and resourceful way to refocus on what is working in life rather that what isn't.

What am I grateful for today? Here's my list:

1) Full deep breaths

2) Fresh peanut butter & bananas

3) A happy marriage

4) Early summer rain

5) Freedom to express

It's that simple. Post your list in the comments box below. Share your positive attitude with me and those around you. See the difference it will make.

Robert Dioguardi, CPCC
Visceral Coaching
Certified Empowerment Coach
www.visceralcoaching.com

robert@visceralcoaching.com

Where do you want to be in 30 days?

Enroll in the 30 Day Visceral Goals Intensive.

Commit Yourself /Achieve Your Goals/Create Your Future

The Art of Listening

Become aware of your surroundings and pay attention to your listening. Is your listening active or inactive?

In my very first professional acting class I was told to make the other person more important. Simply stated, It's my job to listen and react to my partner under the given circumstances of a script as if for the first time, every time. As a coach, I'm trained to listen; listen to what's going on with my clients, mind, body and soul.
I do this by employing a few different levels of awareness when I'm listening. You can do this too. In business meetings, with your employees, team members, vendors & clients. With your friends, family, significant other and children.

Here's a breakdown of the levels of listening awareness:

First, there's a geocentric type of listening whereby we relate what the other person is saying by thinking & saying what we did when whatever they're talking about "happened to us". This kind of listening keeps the focus on the listener rather than the one who is being listened to. This type of listening has a short reach that only serves to keep the focus on the one's self. This is never a great place to listen from when a person needs to work in teams or partnerships

Second is an acute & direct form of listening that holds sharp attention to what the other person is saying. Attention is 100% over there; eyes locked, aware of what is being said. Attention is being paid. This a great for one-to-one interpersonal skills, problem solving and short time frame discussions where information needs to be disseminated.

Third is an environmental type of listening. One listens to the other and incorporates the space around them into the listening process. Examples are, listening for things that are said or not said, drawing awareness to the emphasis on words or phrases, self editing, pauses, emotional reactions, focus of the eyes, interruptions in the conversation. This is a deeper level of listening. It allows us to listen not only with our ears & brains, but our hearts and bodies as well. A wealth of information is accessed when listening from this deep place. This level of awareness also sparks a persons intuition or gut reactions to things.

These levels of listening awareness are always available to us whatever our profession, life circumstance, mood, disposition or objective. I invite you to direct your attention to your listening skills. Use these techniques in your business and your life and see if anything changes as a result. Post a comment, let me know how it went.

Robert Dioguardi, CPCC
Visceral Coaching
Certified Empowerment Coach
www.visceralcoaching.com

robert@visceralcoaching.com

Where do you want to be in 30 days?

Enroll in the 30 Day Visceral Goals Intensive.

Commit Yourself /Achieve Your Goals/Create Your Future

Nine Steps To Regain Focus & Direction

As an Empowerment Coach, I have the opportunity to come into contact with people who know on an intuitive level that there is some thing more that they need to be doing in their lives; a desire to play a bigger game. That desire is communicated to me is so many different ways. The choice of words are different, the ideas for action are different and the types of commitment are different, but the spirit of the desire remains the same. Often there exists some confusion or hesitation about where a person is and what the next step is to move forward in an empowering, resourceful way. To assist is regaining focus & direction in ones life I use the following nine steps. This is done as directed form of stream of consciousness writing:

1) Who am I? - A short question that asks us to take an inward look. Name, Family, Origin, belief systems, values, assumption, agenda. No editing!

2) What time is it? - Time of day, week, month, quarter, year, decade, millennium. What moment are you in? Get present.

3) Where Am I? - Physically, spiritually, emotionally. Be detailed.

4) What surrounds me? - See, smell, hear, touch & taste your immediate & ancillary surroundings. Write it all down.

5) What are my Circumstances? - What brought to the place you are in right now? Are you at work, home, on vacation, on the bus? Happy, sad, indifferent? Where did you just come from? Where are you going to?

6) What Is My Relationship? - To yourself, those immediately around you, your friends, family, spouse, co-workers, acquaintances, enemies, neighbors, etc...

7) What Do I Want? - Another short & deep question. What is your desired focus? Be detailed!

8) What's In My Way (of getting what I want) - What are the hurdles for you to jump? Name them. Are they "out there"? "In here"?

9) What Do I Do To Get What I Want? - Time for action. Be specific. Choose a direction. Claim your commitments & go!

The nine steps are there for a person to take a "snap-shot, cross-section" of who, what & where they truly are in a given moment. From there they can take the next empowering, resourceful step to fulfilling their day-to- day life. I Invite you to try this out with yourself or your clients. Post a comment and let me know how it goes.

Robert Dioguardi, CPCC

Certified Professional Co-Active Coach

Visceral Coaching

robert@visceralcoaching.com

Top 10 Cool & Groovy Things To Do This Summer

It's a well known fact that we live longer healthier lives when we are laughing, relaxed and content.These are all qualities of Summer. So even though summer is technically still about a month away, It's good to get a jump on the top 10 cool & groovy things to do this summer. Whether you're a beach bum or a land lubber, this list has something for you to stay in the calm & relaxed mindset of Summer.

1) Eat a tomato like an apple. - Make sure it's a ripe one and don't forget the napkin.

2) Watch the sunrise over the Ocean. - Grab a special friend & watch as the sky turns night-blue to pink to azure to yellow to daylight all in 60-90 minutes
3) Ride a Ferris wheel. - Take in the atmosphere of a carnival from the highest point
4) Body surf. - It's all in the timing & wave choice, but you know you got it right when you end up on the sand with a mouth full of sea foam!
5) Watch an awesome fireworks display from a comfy locale. - Bring the digital camera to snap images for year long Ooo's & Ahhh's
6) Go to a baseball game. Hey, they don't call it our national past time for nothin'. Any game, any level of sport.
7) Eat a hot dog - guilt free. Moderation is key here, but indulge for a night.
8) Go camping, make a campfire - Step away from the iThing for the weekend, become one with nature & gaze into the dancing flames. (The campfire app will be waiting for you on Monday morning)
9) Read the Sunday paper cover to cover then take a nap in the shade. - 'Nuf said.
10) Host or attend a BBQ with great food and great friends. - No special occasion needed. Make memories.

If you can sail through this list in a few weeks then recycle through them again! Do you have a list of your own? Post a comment. Let me know.

Robert Dioguardi, CPCC

Certified Professional Co-Active Coach

Visceral Coaching

robert@visceralcoaching.com

Get What You Want

We all want something. Always. And we all want someone to do things for us. This is not selfish, dishonest or manipulative. This is life & business. Examples: managers present incentives for their sales force to make their numbers, parents offer rewards for their children for good behavior, dog owners dangle a treat to recall their dogs. In any situation involving human interaction; simple or complex; personal, professional or otherwise there exists three basic principals.

1) An objective (That "thing" that a person wants)

2) An obstacle (That "thing" in the way of getting what a person wants)

3) An action (That thing to "do" to get what a person wants, i.e. overcome the obstacle)

Here's a very simple step-by-step breakdown of how you get clarity on what you want, stay focused on it and jump the hurdles along the way. This is great for problem solving, managerial skills & interpersonal issues in the workplace as well.

1) Objective:

Ask yourself the following question. What do I want? Get a promotion? Communicate more effectively? Start a family? loose weight? What ever it is, be specific and write it down.

2)Obstacle:

Ask yourself the following question. What's in the way of getting what I want?

Often times the famous Pogo comic strip quote, "We have met the enemy and he is us" applies here. Take an inventory of whatever is in your way. Again, get specific about it. Name it. Write it down.

3) Action

Ask yourself the following question. What will I do to get what I want?

Given the presupposition that we are all acting within the moral, ethical and legal confines of our global society, what is the most resourceful action for you to take to overcome the obstacle in your way from achieving your objective? How much of it is within your power to change? How much of it do you need to rely on others to change? Specificity is important here. Name it.

Armed with these three specific questions and answers, you will be able to achieve and progress in any interpersonal interaction. The truth is, we all answer these questions in nano-seconds hundreds and hundreds of times a day, everyday of our lives. This three step process is designed to put the process in super slow-motion and allow you the time to be conscious of how to effectively get to the next level of your life. You handle the specifics, i.e. career, money, health, friends & family, personal growth, recreation, physical environment. Just plug in the issue to the algorithm and strap yourself in for a speedy trip to the next level.

Robert Dioguardi, CPCC

Certified Professional Co-Active Coach

www.visceralcoaching.com

Tips on maintaining focus on your new years resolution

So its the end of January, the glitz of the New Years celebration has worn off for sure, the winter weather has moved in for a 3 month sublet and right about now is the time when we all get a little slippery with the resolutions we were so gung-ho about on New Years Day. If you're saying "Yes, that's me" and/or you find yourself wondering what exactly it was that you've resolved to change in 2010, here are 5 tips on how to give your resolutions a booster shot for lasting positive change.



1) Make it specific.

A resolution "to get more rest" is general and allows for too much wiggle room. Don't let yourself wiggle out of your commitment. Write down your resolution in it's most simple essential form. For example: I will go to bed at 9:30pm, 3 days a week for one month.





2) Put it in your calendar.

When do you want to achieve this resolution. In the example above, choose a specific day to begin and a specific day to end, then commit. If it's a "being-state" resolution - For example: you want to be nicer to your mother-in-law - then break it down to specific step by step actionable components that you can track. For example: I will call my mother-in-law once a week and ask, "how are you?" This is a simple actionable step that supports the larger resolution of wanting to be nicer to your mother-in-law.





3) Be held accountable to your resolution.

Tell someone - who is not a friend - that you want to achieve this resolution and ask them to help you with it. A co-worker, supervisor, employer, coach or mentor. It's important that it not be a friend because friends tend to let us slide when we get lazy or unspecific about our goals. A boss, supervisor, mentor or coach is more likely to hold you to what it is you say you want to do. Especially a coach. That's our job!





4) Make a resolution that you actually want to achieve.

Wanting it for yourself, working towards it, knowing that your quality of life will improve because of it will sustain you during times when you lack focus. So check your gut. Ask yourself what you truly want to resolve. Then commit to it.





5) Make it BIG for cryin' out loud!

You want to incorporate a resolution (change) in you life, so step boldly into it. Visualize yourself already doing/being that resolution. Allow yourself to feel what its like and claim it as yours. Personify who you will be once the resolution is achieved.
Here's a hint: It's OK if it's a little scary. That makes it exciting and it also expands the limits of who you think you are & what you can do. It's always more than what you think. Always.


Good luck! And know that we can all do & be what want by:

a) Claiming it

b) Committing to it

c) Achieving it

For more information on how to maintain focus on your New Years Resolutions, how to set clear resonant goals & achieve them go to http://www.visceralcoaching.com/



Robert Dioguardi, CPCC

Certified Empowerment Coach

http://www.visceralcoaching.com/

2010's Reinvention Rant

Well, it's a New Year already. Time really does fly. I'll bet at some point during the holiday week/s you've looked at the dwindling December calendar and found yourself saying "where'd it all go? The month? The year? And oh my G-d, the decade!!" Yeah, the decade. Remember Y2K? That was the big concern for the beginning of the millennium. Guess it worked out okay. In the wake of graver problems however: 9/11, a war with two fronts, fear mongering, greed and economic collapse. And thankfully this decade comes to a close with more positive events: political history, hope and in the midst of it all - the opportunity to reinvent. Between you and me, I prefer the way this decade is going out to the way it came in.
Either way, for better or worse, we all went through it. All over the world. And we each have our own experiences attached to it. So now the December calendar has dwindled, the holidays have come & gone and the 2010's are underway.
So what's next? This a new beginning - a new year, a new decade, "new & different times". Sounds like the grumblings of a reinvention to me. And what an opportunity to begin again with a clean slate, to not compromise one's self, to consciously make powerful choices towards inner fulfillment. Hey, sign me up. I'm in.

So here's the Visceral Coaching question of the day.

What will you do to live a powerful uncompromising life in the 2010's?
You know what, I'll re frame - Asking about a decade-to-come might be a bit intimidating.
What will you do to live a powerful uncompromising life...starting today?

After all, today really is all we have. When we wake up tomorrow, it will be today. And the day after tomorrow? That will be today when it arrives. So that invites the same question. What will you do today? And today, and today, and today, to lead a powerful and uncompromising life. Broken down, it really is as simple as choosing to do it. Really. But when brought to the doorstep of making that choice is when we hesitate. This is about the time that our inner critic begins ratteling off the "reasons" that things aren't the way we really want them to be. Like for instance... "some thing happened yesterday that keeps us from being who we want to be or doing what we want to do today". Well, what's yesterday but a memory of the past. The memory of the dinosaurs are just as "real" as the memory of a lost job or the things left unsaid. They are not who/what we are, they are just memories - subjective memories at that. And here's a really good "reason": "The past makes us who we are today". Yeah, that's a good one. That one is practically impervious to large living. It's an excuse we use to serve up our responsibility for ourselves on a silver holiday platter to stay in a small dark comfortable box and maybe even blame others for our own smallness. Forget about yesterday. It's gone. It no longer exists. So to is the idea of who we thought we were.
And then there's tomorrow. The unknown. What will happen if..? Who will we be if..? What if..? Tomorrow is the juicy part of the reinvention equation. Remember, tomorrow is today in advance. Tomorrow will be the today where we have the chance to change, to reinvent. Today, right now to be specific, is special. Today we can wake up. Today is the day reinvention begins. Right now it begins. Right now.
That's my rant for the beginning of this decade. I ask that you keep me accountable for my own little corner of the reinvention movement. And I want to hold you accountable. So give it a shot. Start today. Do some thing differently today to get you one step closer to the kick ass life that you know you are able to lead. If you are already living life at a 10 out of 10, then take a moment to acknowledge yourself for busting your limits. And then see what you can do to go to 11, 12, 25 out of 10.
Visceral Coaching offers a structure to take you to 11 & beyond. check out the 30 Day Visceral Goals Intensive at http://www.visceralcoaching.com It all starts right now. Commit yourself, Achieve your goals, Create your future.