We all want something. Always. And we all want someone to do things for us. This is not selfish, dishonest or manipulative. This is life & business. Examples: managers present incentives for their sales force to make their numbers, parents offer rewards for their children for good behavior, dog owners dangle a treat to recall their dogs. In any situation involving human interaction; simple or complex; personal, professional or otherwise there exists three basic principals.
1) An objective (That "thing" that a person wants)
2) An obstacle (That "thing" in the way of getting what a person wants)
3) An action (That thing to "do" to get what a person wants, i.e. overcome the obstacle)
Here's a very simple step-by-step breakdown of how you get clarity on what you want, stay focused on it and jump the hurdles along the way. This is great for problem solving, managerial skills & interpersonal issues in the workplace as well.
1) Objective:
Ask yourself the following question. What do I want? Get a promotion? Communicate more effectively? Start a family? loose weight? What ever it is, be specific and write it down.
2)Obstacle:
Ask yourself the following question. What's in the way of getting what I want?
Often times the famous Pogo comic strip quote, "We have met the enemy and he is us" applies here. Take an inventory of whatever is in your way. Again, get specific about it. Name it. Write it down.
3) Action
Ask yourself the following question. What will I do to get what I want?
Given the presupposition that we are all acting within the moral, ethical and legal confines of our global society, what is the most resourceful action for you to take to overcome the obstacle in your way from achieving your objective? How much of it is within your power to change? How much of it do you need to rely on others to change? Specificity is important here. Name it.
Armed with these three specific questions and answers, you will be able to achieve and progress in any interpersonal interaction. The truth is, we all answer these questions in nano-seconds hundreds and hundreds of times a day, everyday of our lives. This three step process is designed to put the process in super slow-motion and allow you the time to be conscious of how to effectively get to the next level of your life. You handle the specifics, i.e. career, money, health, friends & family, personal growth, recreation, physical environment. Just plug in the issue to the algorithm and strap yourself in for a speedy trip to the next level.
Robert Dioguardi, CPCC
Certified Professional Co-Active Coach
www.visceralcoaching.com
